The Most Epic Food Fight Hogwarts Has Ever Seen
by AquiViva
Summary: One-shot. Rose Weasley was cleaning out the Burrow's attic when she discovered a plaque one uncle had given another. Prompt: The most epic food fight Hogwarts has ever seen was started by George hitting Fred with custard. Disclaimer: I own no rights to the Harry Potter franchise.


Rose Weasley was sick and tired of being forced to dust, organize, and do a thorough clean-up of the attic. She had gotten into a spot of trouble at Hogwarts for one too many messy pranks, and so her mother, Hermione, decided that a little "cleaning the Muggle way" might help her understand that cleaning up someone else's mess is quite a chore. She had been sent up to the attic of the Burrow on a warm summer afternoon, just a few days after returning home at the end of 5th Year.

She had been up there for about two hours before she found a trunk tucked off to one side; this trunk was filled to the brim with old Hogwarts homework, broken joke toys, some old quidditch gear, assorted items of clothing, and a few notebooks filled with a messy scrawl she didn't recognize. These notebooks detailed how to make items that Rose knew to be trademarked as _Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes_ products. Knowing how to bend instructions as needed, Rose decided cleaning out this trunk filled with interesting items and a glimpse into the past was a much better plan for her afternoon, so she pulled the trunk over to one of the large pillows laying off to one side and got comfortable.

After organizing the trunk into small piles of similar things, she got started on sorting out the homework from the joke and prank ideas. She figured she'd give Uncle George the growing pile of said ideas and maybe he'd help her out with a few ideas of her own.

She had almost reached the end of the ginormous pile of homework when she uncovered a small, worn plaque reading "Most Epic Food Fight Hogwarts Has Ever Seen" and in smaller lettering below that, "Awarded to Messer George Weasley for a magnificent custard throw and to Messer Fred Weasley for his handsome face being an excellent target." Chuckling to herself, she grabbed the plaque and headed downstairs to find her Uncle and get an idea of who had given them the award and the whole story, because honestly, who wouldn't want to know?

As she reached the bottom of the stairs, her mum rounded the corner. "Have you finished cleaning up the attic yet? What are you doing with that?" Hermione asked, a stern look on her face.

"Um, it's about half done… But is Uncle George around? I found this plaque and it's a story I've never heard before!" Rose held out the plaque, hoping her mum would focus on that rather than the fact that she'd come downstairs before she was finished her chore.

"Oh my! I didn't realize George still had this laying around!" Hermione exclaimed, one hand reaching out for the plaque. "George! Where are you? Rosie found your food fight award!"

George's voice came in through the open window, "Out here by the pitch, we're just enjoying a nice cold drink. Why don't you two join us?"

Rose turned to her mum, mouth open, ready to start arguing her way into getting out of cleaning when Hermione's eyes narrowed.

"You can go outside and show your uncle this, but as soon as the story is finished, you are headed right back upstairs young lady. Don't think I don't know what it is you're trying to do here."

Rose smiled, "Of course mum, I wouldn't dream of it." She scurried outside plaque in hand. "Uncle George! Here, I found this. I imagine there's a story involved?"

George and Ron were sitting near the quidditch pitch in the backyard, enjoying the late June afternoon sun. As Rose rounded the corner and came up beside him, George smirked and took the plaque, "Of course there's a story involved, what kind of question is that?"

"Well hurry up and start the story then! And make it long, I'm supposed to be cleaning right now." She cast a side glance at her father, but he didn't seem to catch everything she said.

Chuckling, George patted the seat next to him, taking a swig of his drink before clearing his throat. "Well, we were in Seventh year. It was just after Valentine's Day - one Saturday I think. Freddie, Lee and I had finished up working on some Wheezes products and were sitting at the table eating dinner. Freddie being Freddie was teasing anyone within earshot and I figured why not help folks out and get him to shut up for a second. You see, Fred and I always picked on one another, yeah, we teamed up against everyone else, but no one else could ever get either one of us as good as we got each other.

"So, in a singular act of greatness, I scooped up a handful of custard while his back was turned and as soon as he turned back I smoked him right in the cheek. Fred sat there for a second, caught completely off guard before scooping up some other dessert and throwing it right back at me. I ducked behind Lee so it got him instead. As you can probably guess, Lee snatched up something else and chucked it right back and from then on it was a free for all. Desserts and drinks and anything else you can think of went flying back and forth; all the tables joined in, even the grouchy old snakes. McGonagall was on her feet hollering at the three of us to quit, Snape was sitting off to one side looking like the grouchy old bat he is, and old Dumbledore was there at the center of the head table with that twinkle in his eye. Eventually, we stopped tossing food around, the three of us got served a few detentions, and we were off to our room to clean up a little.

"The next day, we overheard some of the other students going on about how that was the most epic food fight Hogwarts has ever seen. So then, of course, Freddie got the idea in his head that we should get a plaque for it. He made it up later that night and in front of the entire Common Room, presented it to me, and himself of course - you saw how his own name was on there."

Rose was laughing and envisioning the scene playing out as he told it while Ron was shaking his head, chuckling to himself. "The number of things you two got up to George, it's a wonder you even got OWLs!"

"OWLs and NEWTs aren't everything Rosie, remember that one." George winked at his niece and she rolled her eyes.

"Yes Uncle George, I know, exams aren't everything."

"Well enough about boring stuff, did you ever hear about our swamp hallway and fireworks send off we had the year of Umbridge?" George asked, smirking and looking out over the yard. "If not, get comfy, cause this is another wondrous tale of Freddie's and my genius."


End file.
